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February 18, 2014 / Gul Malani

Be a Role Model

ID-10091910The best way to bring up children well is for us to be what we want them to grow up to be. Parents should be good Role Models! Yes, we parents have a full time unpaid modelling career if we really care for our families! Kids learn from imitating their loved ones and we, parents have a lot of impact on the way the child thinks and behaves even when he/she has grown up!

For starters, we are listing some of the capabilities and activities that will make us good role models.

-capacity to laugh at ourselves and our mistakes & errors

-living in the present moment and fully accepting the present situation as it is now

-acknowledging the precious presence of people around us

-being peaceful, patient and proactive rather than being highly strung, uptight and reactive

-accepting our own self as we are now

-being polite, respectful and loving to others

-willingness to listen to others without commenting or advising

-always having time to help others

-indulging in sports and hobbies regularly

-indulging in physical activity daily to maintain our immunity and our health

-spending time enjoying and appreciating the beautiful Nature and the Universe around us

-willing to learn through out our life from others, books, Internet and all the available sources like this blog as well as

If any of the above capabilities and activities are lacking in us please do not fret and fume! It is quite ok for all of us to be what we are now and do whatever we are doing now! No rapidly planned changes or control are required to develop any of the above capabilities or add new activities. The only thing required is that we become aware that certain capabilities and activities are not part of us at present! This awareness alone will bring about the required change in us without any stress or self abuse!

Development of new capabilities and activities is an extremely slow process and will happen only at the appropriate time and not when we desire it! In the meantime we should be happy to live life as fully as we can, accepting our own self as we are now, and do the best we can for our little darlings and precious children!

What humans (including children) need is nurture in the form of love and the ability to observe older humans going about their everyday lives. – Bruce H. Lipton Ph.D. in his book ‘The Biology of Belief’ 160817

Parents who live in the present moment and meditate, soon discover the infinite Peace or Emptiness within and outside their own bodies. Such parents radiate positive energy which fosters healthy growth of children, both physically as well as psychologically. – The Totality  291017

The child accepts as his model only those to whom he is strongly attached… The desire for sameness with important attachment figures leads to some of a child’s most significant and spontaneous learning experiences, even though closeness, not learning, is the underlying motivation. Such learning occurs without either the parent having much conscious intent of teaching or the child of studying. In the absence of attachment the learning is laboured and the teaching forced. – Gordon Neufeld, Ph.D., and Gabor Mate, M.D. in their book ‘Hold On to Your Kids’  181117

As the Ego develops in the child, the child’s inherent capability to give unconditional love reduces to conditional love. Conditional love is, when children and even adults, give love only when they are sure that they will be getting something more in return! Sad as this is, some of us can make an effort to improve and evolve beyond our Ego, with it’s severe limitations, and redevelop our capabilities of giving unconditional love. Such people become role models of humans living a wonderfully meaningful life, making our planet a beautiful place to live in. – The Totality 150118

When a child is born. the mother and father do not automatically become good parents. They have to work on themselves, become more aware and evolve. Truly, parental role is not to train the child, nor to train others around the child to be good parents or grand parents. Their purpose is to evolve and become good role models for children to copy, which the children do automatically in the initial seven years of their childhood. Parents can expect specific behaviour from their children only when they have learnt and conduct themselves in that specific manner. – The Totality 211118

Brilliant parenting is possible by parents who are constantly learning, becoming aware, evolved and have become super role models for living life without any limitations, except for safety considerations, as well as living fully in the physical world, without being attached to it or being overwhelmed by it- The Totality 190120

Parents, who have reprogrammed their Self Identity to be serving others and the Universe rather than expecting service from others and the Universe, make the best Role Models for their children, and others too, for living life fully and happily – The Totality 160220

Parents, who have high acceptance of their life situations and other people and lower expectations from life and other people, can live life at a higher energy level leading to happiness and fullness of living for themselves as well as their children – The Totality 200220

Evolved parents are aware that life situations for each of us are changing uniquely every moment. We normally attribute the changes exclusively  to the effort we have put in; our Ego has put in. Deeper awareness will reveal that our Ego cannot even make a small change without the enormous help and support from the Cosmic Forces which are completely beyond the control of our Ego. So, all we can do is to gracefully and gratefully accept our life situations as they arise and respond, not react to them. Living life responding to our life situations by thinking and doing everything in sync with the Cosmic Forces will lead us to a happy, fulfilled and materially successful life. We, parents, will then become ideal role models for our children to learn how to live a happy, fulfilled and successful life too. – emanated from the Cosmos 250720


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